


Whirl's Choose Your Own Disaster

by ladydragon76



Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One), Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Choose Your Own Adventure, M/M, Warning: Whirl
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-24
Updated: 2016-09-24
Packaged: 2018-08-16 23:54:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 3,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladydragon76/pseuds/ladydragon76
Summary: Summary: You are Whirl, glorious being of Chaos, on an adventure for amusement and boredom relief.  Go.  Fly free little Whirlybirb and Choose Your Own Disaster!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> **‘Verse:** IDW  
>  **Series:** None  
>  **Rating:** PG-13  
>  **Characters:** Whirl  
>  **Warnings:** Whirl  
>  **Notes:** All art by the lovely and talented Masq! Don't expect much from this fic, I did it as a lark and because NK cracked a joke, which I of course told the Twin, and she enabled as well. Rock on you crazy diamonds!

You are Whirl, glorious being of Chaos, on an adventure for amusement and boredom relief. Go. Fly free little Whirlybirb!

DO NOT click 'next chapter' as you go along. There are links at the bottom of each chapter, and those are what you will click. If you wish to go back to the previous choice to try something different, click the backbutton in your browser NOT 'previous chapter'.

As always, please and don't leave any spoilery comments in the chapters. I love comments comments are love, and I can't wait to hear if y'all enjoy this, but I'll have to delete anything that might spoil the adventure for another reader. <3

Thank you all, and have fun!

[CLICK HERE TO BEGIN YOUR ADVENTURE](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619684)


	2. Chapter 2

Bored. Bored. Bored. _Bored_.

And, oh yeah, had Whirl mentioned he was bored?

It'd been like three whole days since anything interesting had happened on the _Lost Light_. Rodimus was slipping. Clearly. Bad Rodimus. It was all his fault Whirl was so frelling _bored_.

Where was he? Whirl looked around at the hall, trying to pin down where his wandering had led him, and saw a door.

It was a glorious door.

It was the door to Brainstorm's lab.

Whirl gave a giddy laugh and hacked the lock. Sparkling's play. One would think a 'genius' would know to keep a more complex locking mechanism on his door.

The light was flicked on, and Whirl bounced into the lab, letting the door shut behind him. Brainstorm's lab was Nirvana. Heaven. Pits, it had nothing on any of those places, not even Hedonia! There were recognizable weapons on tables right next to not-so-recognizable ones. But the stuff left out wouldn't be the _good_ stuff. No, the _good_ stuff was locked up in The Weapons Locker!

Whirl stood before it, snorting at the pathetic lock keeping the doors shut. It was like Brainstorm was just inviting him in. Here, Whirl, take anything you want.

"Don't mind if I do, Stormy. Don't mind if I do," Whirl said and swung the doors open.

There were a wonderful selection of items, but three caught Whirl's optic right away. There were a few grenades, a bright pink gun labeled 'Bubblegum Blaster', and a big red button with a sticky note on it that said 'DO NOT PUSH'.

 

[Juggle the grenades.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619696)  
[Test fire the Bubblegum Blaster.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619702)  
[Push the button.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619705)

[](http://imgur.com/ObSI8xP)


	3. Chapter 3

Whirl pulled three of the grenades from the locker and headed out of the lab. Juggling required room. And an audience. Though maybe he should practice a bit first?

To the observation deck!

Which was dark and quiet and empty. Which was perfect because there was no one to see how many times Whirl dropped the grenades before finally figuring out that if he grabbed them by the rings of their pins, he could wing them back up into the air much easier.

Of course, that also meant there was no one there to point out that if he flung it too hard by the pin, that the pin would come out and arm the grenade.

Whoops.

Luckily, Whirl was pretty damn fast, so he was able to get into the lift and away before the grenade detonated. Walking casually along the halls as the claxons blared and everyone freaked out was entertaining. You'd think they'd never been in danger of critical decompression before. Weirdos.

 

[On to the next disaster!](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619711)


	4. Chapter 4

Whirl lifted the blaster and began looking it over as he headed out of Brainstorm's lab. What was bubblegum? Must be wild since Brainstorm was the one who built it, and it was high time Whirl found out just what the gun did.

"Ah! Contestant number one!" Whirl aimed the bright pink gun at a nearby door and pulled the trigger.

A massive glob of sweet-smelling pink… stuff shot out the end with a _thoop_ sound before splattering across the door and sticking there. Whirl stepped closer, helm tilted as he carefully reached out to touch it. It tried to stick to his pincer's tip, but he escaped it.

"Messy," Whirl muttered, looking at the gun. No one was going to be opening that door for a while. "Bet this would frag a mech up."

"What are you-! Whirl! Is that from my lab?!"

Whirl turned and shot Brainstorm, the Bubblegum Blaster going _thoop_ once again. Brainstorm fell over, hands still outstretched as if to block the shot, but it had coated him in gooey pink… goo. Whirl snickered, then hurried to lay the gun next to Brainstorm. Probably best if he made himself scarce now.

 

[On to the next disaster!](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619711)


	5. Chapter 5

Whirl reached out, plucked the note off, and pushed the button.

Nothing happened, so he pushed it again, more firmly this time. Again, nothing happened.

 _Bo-or-r-r-ing_!

Whirl was about to try one of the other items when he picked up the sounds of shouts from outside the lab. Curious, he went to the door and manually opened it just enough to peek outside.

A yellow optic blinked, and Whirl straightened as he opened the door wider to stare in pleased disbelief. "Guess it did something after all."

Confetti of every possible color filled the hall, stuck to mechs- some of it was still fluttering in the air. "Cool," Whirl said as he stepped out of the lab to admire the blaze of colors.

 

[On to the next disaster!](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619711)


	6. Chapter 6

Leaving others to enjoy the clean-up, Whirl wandered off. That'd been fun, but it hadn't really lasted long enough to kill his boredom dead. He found himself at Perceptor's lab next, and grinned to find the door unlocked.

Oh? Had somebody dashed off to help someone else and left all his fun stuff out to be played with?

Oh~ He had!

Whirl giggled as he headed straight to the table, peering at the odds and ends on it. Perceptor wasn't quite as fun as Brainstorm, but he had _good_ stuff just sitting right out in the open. There was a bottle of green stuff, some weird doohickey, and a whole bunch of pretty-colored liquids. Whirl tapped a claw tip against the lower rim of his helm, considering.

 

[Drink the green stuff.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619714)  
[Fiddle with the doohickey.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619717)  
[Mix the pretty liquids.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619723)

[](http://imgur.com/cbMTsjE)


	7. Chapter 7

Whirl opened his fuel port and poured the green stuff into the funnel. No sooner did it hit his tank than it was rejected.

 _Violently_.

Whirl could see nothing but a hazy of thick, dark green no matter how many times he reset his optic. "Damn it," he muttered, and succeeded in only smearing the green stuff around more as he tried to wipe it off his optic with a forearm.

With a heavy sigh, Whirl set the bottle back on the table, reached into his subspace, and pulled out a cleaning cloth. That helped a bit, but really only allowed Whirl to see how much of a mess the stuff had made of him.

"Gross." There was nothing for it though. Playtime was going to have to be over for now- the stuff was starting to make his plating itch. Whirl gave a sigh of longing at all the other fun stuff just sitting there waiting to be played with, then headed out to find a washrack. Maybe he could come back later.

 

[On to the next disaster!](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619729)


	8. Chapter 8

Whirl picked up the doohickey and turned it over and over in his pincers, trying to figure out just what the frag it was. It looked like a box, but it had a set of buttons on each side. Quite frankly, this looked like a Brainstorm thing, not a Perceptor thing.

Which only meant it might be even more fun than Whirl was expecting!

Well, boxes had things in them, right? So how to open this one? Whirl began pushing random buttons, turning the doohickey from side to side to push others. Finally there was a click from it, and Whirl lifted it up to optic level, squinting at it and-

Orange gas blasted from all sides of it, coating him, the table, the floor… _everything_ in bright, neon orange. Luckily, Whirl had wrenched his helm aside. His neck was ungrateful, but he could see through his optic still. See _all_ that bright farking orange everywhere.

Slag. That sort of made him look really guilty, didn't it?

Whirl hurried out of the lab to find a washrack before Perceptor came back and discovered his doohickey had been messed with.

 

[On to the next disaster!](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619729)


	9. Chapter 9

Whirl looked around, found a bigger, empty glass beaker, and considered which liquid to add first. Each little test tube held something different. Reds and oranges, greens, purples, blues. There was an opaque white and an inky black. Just what the frag did Perceptor do with all these?

Whirl reached for a translucent, light blue and carefully tugged the stopper out. It poured smoothly into the large beaker, and when the test tube was empty, Whirl reached for a sunny yellow one. Mixing them did nothing but create a rather pretty color of green, so he grabbed the white next and dumped it in.

The reaction was immediate, larger than one might predict, set off the alarms, and covered Whirl from head to foot in oozing, fizzing, _purple_ foam. His audials were ringing and his gyros off a bit, but the sprinklers in the lab had just come on, and it was time for him to skedaddle before someone showed up to ruin all his fun. 

 

[On to the next disaster!](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619729)


	10. Chapter 10

That had been somewhat _less_ entertaining, and while cleaning himself up afterward hadn't been boring, it'd been tedious. Whirl poked into various rooms and storage areas, and found that Primus did indeed love him.

Who had brought such a huge box of bouncy balls onto the _Lost Light_? And who else had brought so many cases of firecrackers? How long had they been sitting here, alone, lonely, unacknowledged and unused?

The poor things.

"Don't worry," Whirl crooned to the two boxes as he tugged them to the middle of the storage room floor. "Life's about to get real exciting!"

Or it would, after a few hours. First Whirl had to drill the holes into the bouncy balls, then he had to stuff the hole with a firecracker. _Then_ he had to decide just what to do with them. Oh the options~

But which would be the most fun?

 

[Light and toss a few into Swerve's Bar.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619732)  
[Light and toss a few into Ultra Magnus' office.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619738)  
[Light and toss a few into Drift's meditation room.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619741)

[](http://imgur.com/uBSeIzq)


	11. Chapter 11

Whirl made his way to Swerve's, peeking in to note that the minibot was not, in fact, in there right now. Even better!

Carefully holding a few of the bouncy balls in one pincer, Whirl lit the fuses and tossed them in. The bouncy balls did exactly what they were supposed to- they bounced. In unpredictable directions, startling the mechs at their tables. Then the firecrackers exploded! Mechs screamed. Some ducked. Some fled and made Whirl flatten himself to the wall so he wouldn't get flattened on the floor. First Aid's startled scream rang out, and a stool clattered as the little medic dove over the bar to hide behind it.

Fun! But it didn't last as long as Whirl would have liked, and people were starting to look around. Time to beat feet and disappear before the blame game could begin.

 

[On to the next disaster!](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619747)


	12. Chapter 12

A quick ping to the comms system told Whirl that Ultra Magnus was in his office working. Probably filing reports from the earlier activity. Whirl had to be careful here because getting caught would mean no more fun for a really long time. He lined up a few of the bouncy balls in one pincer, lit the fuses, then opened the door. The balls were lobbed into Magnus' office from beside of the door where the Second in Command wouldn't be able to see Whirl.

"What is-"

_Pop! Pop-pop! Pop!_

Ooo~ Who knew Magnus could yelp in that high a pitch?

"Who did this?!"

And that was Whirl's cue to get out of Dodge! He sprinted off down the hall, skidding around a corner before the laughter escaped and rang out to fill the lift he had just slid into. Primus, that'd been fun!

 

[On to the next disaster!](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619747)


	13. Chapter 13

Well now, _that_ was the sort of meditation Whirl could get behind. Or under. Or over as the case may be. The good thing was that neither Drift nor Rodimus noticed when Whirl eased the door open. They didn't notice when Whirl lit the fuses or tossed the bouncy balls into the room.

They definitely noticed when the firecrackers exploded. Especially the one that bounced off Rodimus' aft before going _pop_. Talk about unpredictable.

Whirl giggled, optic bright as the two flailed in a tangle of limbs, bits of burning bouncy ball still pinging around.

However, no matter how fun the show was, it was time for Whirl to go. They were both pretty quick little slaggers, and Drift's swords were pointy.

 

[On to the next disaster!](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619747)


	14. Chapter 14

Now _that_ was fun! Whirl hurried off before the chaos could be pinned on him, and considered what to do next. He ducked around a corner and spotted Tailgate- which gave him the _best_ idea!

"Hey there, pipsqueak!" Whirl called out, bouncing forward to drop into a sudden crouch right in front of Tailgate. "Wanna have some fun?"

Tailgate did that adorable thing where he tapped his fingertips together and leaned back away from Whirl. "Uh… Fun? Define fun?"

"Feats of strength, balance!" Whirl replied. "Or we could just do free helicopter rides through the halls?"

"That… could be fun," Tailgate said slowly.

"What could be fun?" Rewind asked as he appeared behind Tailgate.

"I think Whirl's a bit bored?" Tailgate whispered to Rewind, though he didn't whisper quietly enough to keep Whirl from hearing him.

"I am bored, but this'll be fun. A total boredom killer!" Whirl stood up, optic bright and a giddy energy in his field. "Let's find us a bunch of minibots! We can-

 

[-stack you guys into cool shapes!"](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619756)  
[-do free helicopter rides!"](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619768)  
[-see how far I can throw each of you!"](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619771)

[](http://imgur.com/we623Sc)


	15. Chapter 15

With Tailgate and Rewind's help, Whirl managed to gather five whole minibots together. That almost made one whole mech, right?

"Ok!" Whirl said, ignoring Huffer's whining and Gears' dubious look. "Gears, you're strong, so you're the base."

"Great. Not like this'll compress my already stressed joints…"

Whirl grabbed Swerve and lifted him. "Whoa! Whirl!"

"Easy there, barkeep," Whirl said. "Gears, hold him on your arm. No, higher."

Gears lifted his arm more, and Whirl parked Swerve's aft on it, shoulder level, then reached for Huffer.

"I don't know about this idea," Huffer whined.

"What? Are you doubting Gears' strength? He's tough, ya know. He can do it." Whirl plopped Huffer on Gears' other arm, then pushed Swerve and Huffer toward each other. "Your turn, pip!" Tailgate squeaked as Whirl lifted him. "Feet on their shoulders."

"Are you sure about this?" Tailgate asked as Huffer moaned piteously and Gears grumbled.

"'Course I am!" Whirl braced Tailgate up until he had his balance then swept little bitty Rewind up into the air. "All the way up, tiny," he said, helping balance Rewind as he stepped onto Tailgate's shoulders.

It was a damn pity that Rewind was up there. He could be recording this, but then it wouldn't be as epic.

"I need a camera," Whirl decided. "Don't move!"

"Uh… Whirl! Wait!" Rewind called, but it was too late. They all came tumbling down in a huge clattering pile of limbs and sharp screams and…

Slag.

"Whirl!" Ultra Magnus barked. "What is the meaning of this?"

"Just some fun to kill the boredom, big mech. Relax." –was apparently the wrong thing to say to Ultra Magnus to avoid a lecture.

 

[It took a while, but finally Whirl was free to find something else to do.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619774)


	16. Chapter 16

The three of them found Swerve on their way to a nice long hall, and Whirl transformed and popped his canopy open. "Who's first? No! You'll all fit, you're tiny. Hop in!"

"Whirl, I really don't-"

"Come on!" Whirl said, cutting Rewind off. "It'll be fun. You'll see."

Tailgate climbed in first, and Whirl cheered for him.

"Oh, what's the worst that can happen?" Swerve asked, then got in too.

"Ooo!" Whirl said, feeling the proverbial lightbulb switch on. "Rewind can record it. We can turn it into one of those motion rides or something for movie night!"

"That's… actually a pretty cool idea," Rewind said as he finally crawled into Whirl's cockpit and sat on Swerve's lap.

"Right? I'm a genius." Whirl snapped the canopy shut, spun up his rotors, and _launched_.

The hallway was perfect for gaining speed, but that wouldn't make a fun movie ride, so he rolled to his side, rotors just barely missing the ceiling, and swept hard around a corner.

Minibots screamed. Whirl laughed.

"I know, right?!" Whirl crowed, whipping the other way around the next corner. He zigged. He zagged. He snapped his rotors straight back and _flipped_ only to shoot back the direction they'd come.

Minibots screamed some more.

See? Great ride.

Right up until Ultra Magnus showed up, stood in the middle of the hall, and made Whirl land.

 

[It took a while, but finally Whirl was free to find something else to do.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619774)


	17. Chapter 17

Tailgate and Rewind helped Whirl find a few more minibots, and though Gears and Huffer took more convincing than Swerve, they all agreed to let Whirl see how far he could toss them.

With provisions, but whatever, Whirl got to throw minibots around!

Finding all the cushions and bolsters and spare blankets to create a padded landing area took a little doing, but they were finally ready. Whirl chose a nice long hallway, and once the landing zone was set up, he reached out and grabbed the first bitty-mech his pincer landed on.

Rewind squeaked, but before he could say anything, Whirl took a couple spinning steps, and threw him.

He… may have underestimated his own strength.

Rewind flew well past the cushions to clatter and tumble on the floor. "Walk it off!" Whirl called, already reaching for the next mech.

Swerve shied back, and Gears ended up being the next one to fly. He was a lot heavier than he looked. A _lot_ heavier than Rewind, so Whirl gave an extra step and whipped Gears into the air.

Gears' scream ended in an _oomph!_ as he landed only about halfway to the cushions.

"Lead in that aft, mech," Whirl said cheerfully.

Huffer squealed and thrashed as Whirl picked him up, but Whirl held tight. "Easy, mech. Too far, not far enough. You'll be just right."

"Oh, Primus, someone _help_!" Huffer shrieked as Whirl gave him a mighty toss.

Huffer flew true and landed right in the middle of the cushions. "See?!" Whirl called, turning to look at Tailgate and Swerve, only to see Ultra Magnus. "Hey there, Mags. Come outta that suit and you can have a turn too." –was the wrong thing to say apparently. Whirl was pretty sure he'd had the color of his plating stripped off by that scathing reply and the lecture that followed.

 

[It took a while, but finally Whirl was free to find something else to do.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619774)


	18. Chapter 18

Ultra Magnus was sparked a killjoy. No one was hurt! They were having fun! Those were screams of _joy_ damnit!

Alas and alack, Whirl was back to wandering alone, bored, with nothing to do, and _no_ , Magnus! Cleaning duty was not the cure to boredom! He just wanted to do something _fun_. Why was fun so hard to find?

Whirl poked the keypads to the doors he passed at random, startling when one actually opened. He peeked in, saw a table with different colored balls of… yarn?

"Guess I could take up knittin'." Whirl eyed his choices for a good long while, picking yarns he liked for color and texture, and eliminating them one by one until he was down to three last choices.

 

[Red](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619777)  
[Orange](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619777)  
[Yellow](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619777)


	19. Chapter 19

[](http://imgur.com/s1aqXn7)

THE END!!

[Take Another Whirl?](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8122474/chapters/18619669)


End file.
